Grand Emperor ‘t Hooft

Dutch physicist Gerard ‘t Hooft has an asteroid named after him. Naming the 1999 Nobel laureate’s asteroid, 9491 Thooft, required special consideration from the International Astronomical Union (IAU). The IAU rules prohibit apostrophes in asteroid names, so Dr. ‘t Hooft’s namesake asteroid was recorded in the ledger as Thooft.

Dr. ‘t Hooft has actually gone through the trouble of writing a constitution and by-laws for the future inhabitants of 9491 Thooft. They’re wonderful!

Why move to 9491 Thooft? Well, tax forms are guaranteed to be no longer than one page. Citizens of 9491 Thooft are strongly encouraged to seek unification with the citizenry of nearby minor planets (though not at the expense of 9491 Thooft’s cultural and linguistic heritage). Finally, the academic nature of 9491 Thooft is ensured by competence-based admission to all of the local universities and mandatory 24-hour libraries and university buildings.

Future immigrants to and guests visiting 9491 Thooft must remember that weapons are not allowed on 9491 Thooft. Those who are caught littering are required to clean up the area to the satisfaction of the local authorities.

And finally, the apostrophe is banned completely. If your name is O’Connor or Brind’Amour, then during your stay on 9491 Thooft, you will be known as Oconnor or Brindamour.

I’m up for a trip, though I’ll have to be sure to disable the apostrophe key from my keyboard before traveling.

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